Words of Wellness with Shelly

Healing the Hidden: Understanding Trauma Through Brain Science with Jaime Weatherholt

• Shelly Jefferis • Season 1 • Episode 110

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Ever wondered why you react so strongly to certain triggers? Your brain might be carrying what therapist Jamie calls an "emotional backpack" – stored trauma that hasn't been properly processed. In this illuminating conversation, Jamie reveals how our brains respond to traumatic experiences and the cutting-edge therapies helping people heal.

As a licensed therapist specializing in trauma, Jamie brings clarity to the complex world of mental wellness. She explains that our brains have two distinct regions – the logical frontal lobe that helps us make conscious decisions, and the emotional back region where trauma gets stored. When we experience triggering events, that back region activates while our logical brain shuts down, explaining why we sometimes react in ways that later confuse us. The revolutionary insight? "Nothing is wrong with you – your brain is responding normally to an abnormal situation."

Through detailed explanations of therapies like EMDR and Brain Spotting, Jamie demystifies the healing process. EMDR uses bilateral eye movements (similar to REM sleep) to help connect the logical and emotional parts of our brains, allowing us to process "unfinished emotions" from past experiences. Brain Spotting works on the fascinating principle that "where you look determines how you feel," using fixed eye positions to access and process trauma. Both approaches help ensure our emotional responses match the actual stimulus in our lives – a key indicator of healing.

The conversation offers hope to anyone struggling with emotional regulation, anxiety, depression, or relationship patterns they can't seem to break. Jaime's work spans across all adult age groups, proving it's never too early or too late to address stored trauma. Most importantly, she emphasizes that seeking therapy isn't just for those with "problems" – it's for anyone wanting to understand themselves better and grow.

Ready to unpack your emotional backpack? Listen now and discover how modern trauma therapy is changing lives through the power of neuroscience and compassionate care. Your healing journey is uniquely yours, and understanding how your brain processes trauma is the first step toward emotional freedom.

CONNECT WITH JAMIE:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enlightenedomaha

Podcast:  https://www.instagram.com/theshrinkshow


CONNECT WITH SHELLY:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wellnesswithshellyj https://www.instagram.com/momswhoflourish
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ShellyJefferis

LINK to upcoming MOMS WHO FLOURISH Wellness Event October 4th: https://buy.stripe.com/00weVc40n64nbsNblH0gw0p

A few of Shelly's favorite clean products:

High quality, clean nutrition and beauty products: https://shellyjefferis.isagenix

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https://scoutandcellar.com/?u=healthyhappyhours

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Thank you for listening to the Words of Wellness podcast with Shelly Jefferis. I am honored and so grateful to have you here and it would mean the world to me if you could take a minute to follow, leave a 5-star review and share the podcast with anyone you love and anyone you feel could benefit from the message.

Thank you and God Bless! And remember to do something for yourself, for your wellness on this day!
In Health,

Shelly

Speaker 1:

and your brain is just trying to figure it out. It just also has layers of other emotions that are maybe making your brain feel overwhelmed, you know, overstimulated.

Speaker 2:

Do you get confused by all of the information that bombard us every day on ways to improve our overall health and our overall wellness? Do you often feel stuck, unmotivated or struggle to reach your wellness goals? Do you have questions as to what exercises you should be doing, what foods you should or should not be eating, how to improve your overall emotional and mental well-being? Hello everyone, I am so excited to welcome you to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelly Jeffries and I will be your host. My goal is to answer these questions and so much more to share tips, education and inspiration around all of the components of wellness through solo and guest episodes. With 35 plus years as a health and wellness professional, a retired college professor, a speaker and a multi-passionate entrepreneur, I certainly have lots to share. However, my biggest goal and inspiration in doing this podcast is to share the wellness stories of others with you, to bring in guests who can share their journeys so that we can all learn together while making an impact on the health, the wellness and lives of all of you, our listeners. The ultimate hope is that you leave today with even just one nugget that can enhance the quality of your life, and that you will. We all will, now and into the future, live our best quality of lives, full of energy, happiness and joy. Now let's dive into our message for today. Now let's dive into our message for today.

Speaker 2:

Hello everyone, and welcome back to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelly and I will be your host, and my guest today is a licensed therapist and a clinical social worker, and it's going to be very, very fascinating to hear about her line of work and who she focuses her expertise on in the population that she works with. I cannot wait to share her with everyone, and she is the host. I love the name of her podcast, the Shrink Show Podcast. So welcome, jamie, to the show.

Speaker 1:

I'm so honored to have you on, Hi. Thank you so much for having me, Shelly.

Speaker 2:

Absolutely, and I'm really grateful that our paths crossed and we've connected. And you know I know we were talking earlier and I just shared how important is. This is not anything new or life shattering, but how important in the area of mental wellness is to our overall wellness. I think it's. I think it tops all aspects of wellness. It's, it's so, it affects everything. You know, like you said, mental, physical. It kind of goes hand in hand, but I believe the mental aspect is really the bigger component that really helps us all or hinders us, however things are going. I guess, if you could look at it that way, right, yeah, yes, oh, absolutely.

Speaker 2:

So you have a special population that you work with. I think, from what I gather and what we've shared, Tell us a little bit about that. I think your big focus is on individuals who have experienced or are going through trauma, right?

Speaker 1:

Yes, to give it a big blanket statement yes, it's. I work with adults who may have gone through any type of trauma childhood, adult trauma, you know, a sudden, acute issue and I I enjoy working with them because my trainings are in EMDR, which is eye movement, desensitization and reprocessing therapy, and I'm also trained in brain spotting and I'm also certified in hypnotherapy, and so all of these modalities are the way I put it is they're talking to the same part of the brain. They're just taking a different road to that destination. So, similar to how we can learn differently, whether it's like audio, visual, tactile, right, I think we heal differently and so just understanding a little bit of how trauma affects the brain, how how each healing modality tries to talk to that traumatized part of the brain, that's how I try to integrate all of those modalities for my clients.

Speaker 2:

That is fascinating. Can you share because that they're new to me? I mean, I think probably we've heard about hypnotherapy and we can talk about that a little bit for sure, but I would love to hear a little bit more about the other two modalities, those those are new to me. If you could share a little bit, that would be wonderful.

Speaker 1:

Absolutely so. Emdr so it started in the early nineties from Francine Shapiro. So the EM in EMDR stands for eye movement and the idea is, when we move our eyes from side to side, left, right, similar to REM state of sleep, we she found that we are processing or we are desensitizing an emotion or an experience and in this particular therapy modality, a traumatic event. So what I do as the therapist is someone will come see me and they will say something to the effect of oh, like with parenting, for example, they'll say I've read all the books, I know how I want to parent, but for some reason I I end up yelling at my kid, like I just get so angry and I and I hate that I keep doing that. And or I have I end up exploding at my husband over the littlest things, and, and so a lot of times when we do things without consciously thinking about it, meaning the front part of our brain is our conscious part, she's the part of our brain that's like yes, I can predict what's going to happen next. I see A, b, I'm going to predict C comes next. I'm aware what time it is and I have an appointment in an hour, so I have to do X, y and Z in an hour. So I have to do X, y and Z. That's the front part of our brain, very logical. Back part of our brain is where our emotions are and where our instincts are, so where trauma also goes. Our amygdala is back there and so it's really responsible for that fight, flight, freeze or fawn part and we cannot consciously choose to go into that phase. Our body and our emotions decide for us. So, going back to my client example, she logically knows I want to stay calm with my child, but my back part of my brain is yelling because I'm feeling activated, I'm feeling triggered and I'm going into, well, yelling. That would be a fighting reflex, right, going into my fight reflex.

Speaker 1:

So EMDR is a protocol-based therapy. So we follow a protocol in which we are asking certain questions, the therapist is guiding the client and then we we do some sort of eye movement, meaning like there sometimes people have a light bar in which you can just follow the light going back and forth. You could, um, I, if you're face to face with me, I could literally just have my fingers go back and forth, just and in a slow tempo. So you are looking left, right, left, right and and that is helping your brain desensitize and reprocess whatever that fight responses, whatever is happening back there. And it's.

Speaker 1:

And the right stimulus of the eye movement is inviting the logical part of your brain into the conversation. Because we know through brain scans when you are emotionally activated, that front frontal lobe is not working, it is not activated. You cannot think clearly. When you are emotionally activated, emdr is igniting movement into that part of the brain with the eye movements, because we've done brain scans to show that that is what's actually happening with the eye movements and so it is inviting the frontal lobe into a conversation with our emotionally triggered brain. Does that make sense?

Speaker 2:

Yes, and this is so interesting I can't even tell you now my, my. My first question for you is have they found? This must be a thing. But I'm going to ask you when it comes to men and women, because I, in in in my case my husband, has more logical brain, I'm more of the emotional person. So my first thought is gosh, initially, do you find those strengths? You know, with the women they're more developed I don't know if you would call it that more active in the back part of their brain versus men in the front? That's my first question. Sure, and then you probably find which? I think this is probably kind of basic and for sure an answer. I'm answering my question. But what we experience and that trauma and the emotions of it get stored right, they get stored in this section of our brain.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, okay.

Speaker 1:

So first question, what you're describing just kind of a blanket statement, the whole idea that, like you know, more emotional, more logical, it can happen to anybody across the board. The difference is is, just like you and me, something triggering to you might not be triggering to me. So I'm going to assume, if we're talking like you and your husband, something activating for you emotionally, your back part of the brain she's like, oh boy, we're. We're talking, like you and your husband, something activating for you emotionally, your back part of the brain she's like, oh boy, we're, we're activated, right, but your husband is like, well, that's not triggering to me. So of course I'm coming at you, shelly, with logic, but I bet you, if we switch a setting and your husband is activated with whatever triggers him, you're probably coming at him with a hello, settle down. Here's my X, y and Z. So I think it purely is what is triggering to you. It may create you to be more quote, unquote emotional, right, because somebody who isn't activated, I would not expect them to get as quote, unquote, emotional.

Speaker 2:

That makes so much sense. I love that and you're so right, like I, I can, I can think like situations where it has been like that, where something will trigger him, and I'm like, why are you so upset over this? So it's so funny because I tend to get the, you know, get the oh, you're emotional. Well, I'm like, I'm proud of it, I'm not going to hide that I am, and I, you know. But it's so interesting when you're talking, it just makes me think of that right away. And that's so how you just explained it so simply makes so much sense because, like you said, what triggers one person isn't going to trigger another, and vice versa. So that's so fascinating, makes so much sense and to me, that can really alleviate some of the conflicts that people or couples have. Right, because you realize, okay, I can step back and go okay, this is triggering you, that's okay, let that person go through the emotion or whatever it is they're going through and just realize that's for whatever triggering them. And that's, that's something that you have to work through, right.

Speaker 1:

Yes, a hundred percent. And then you have to repeat what was your other question. I lost it.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I think the other one was basically just the difference between men and women, but the other one was about the fact that these experiences that we go through growing up in our younger years, that can be traumatic. Then it gets stored in that part of our brain Because I think, and I'm not sure, but you're bringing that out because maybe it was stored, maybe it wasn't fully expressed in the younger years. So now you're working on kind of bringing some of that out. Is that true?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, oh yes, absolutely. So. Think about, you know, anybody's lifetime of experiences. Right, theoretically, in a perfect world, this is what should happen. We'll go through our day and events will happen Good, bad, happy, sad, any sort of things and then I go to bed, I get a full night's sleep and in REM sleep, remember, we do eye movement in REM sleep. In our REM sleep. That is when we digest our day's events and emotions. And when we fully get that, that chunk of sleep, I will store yesterday's memories and events in my long-term memory and I will wake up refreshed and rejuvenated. I can remember yesterday's events and I can say, yeah, that scary thing happened, but I can tell you about it and I feel, in my body, neutral, I do not feel activated, I do not feel scared.

Speaker 1:

Emotions they have a beginning and a middle and an end, and so when we do not get ample sleep or we have a very intense or traumatic or perhaps like a repeated traumatic issue, like you're in an abusive home. So every day you wake up and it's still abusive, right? You're never getting out of this danger. So a good night's sleep is not going to end the emotion. You're stuck in the middle.

Speaker 1:

So what happens when you're stuck in the middle, your emotions in the back part of our brain. It doesn't have a sense of time, so it doesn't realize the start time and the present age in which you are are different. So the next time you feel scared for example, it's as if you're when you're stuck in the middle you pick up a rock, add it to your backpack and then I feel scared again. Right, something scary happened. Well, because it's stuck in the middle, the back part of our brain is going to pick up where it last left off and then add to that level of scared. So each time I feel scared, I'm going to add it to my backpack. Fast forward to my grown up clients that I work with.

Speaker 1:

They're like I don't know why I just am so easily irritable.

Speaker 1:

Or we all have seen or worked with or met a grownup who just they could explode at the drop of a hat and a lot of times I'm like, well, that's an unfinished emotion, right?

Speaker 1:

If the stimulus does not match the emotional reaction, then that tells me that person has an unfinished emotion. It just it's emotional transference is the term I created for it. I'm emotionally taking out on you what actually doesn't belong to you. You know I'm transferring that emotional actually doesn't belong to you. You know I'm transferring that emotional, that unfinished emotion, onto you. So EMDR helps finish all of those unfinished emotions, because you're going to leave my session and you're going to feel emotions again. But the idea is your emotional response is going to match the stimulus presented and so I could get angry, but it's going to match the level of stimulus that made me angry and I can more easily reach the end of that emotion, perhaps through good night's sleep, perhaps because I've learned good tools and techniques to sit without emotion a little bit of both. So EMDR is just helping kind of push that through those unfinished emotions.

Speaker 2:

That's so interesting I would imagine. I mean every, every. I can't imagine anyone not having unfinished emotions, right? Because as we grow up, we go through our experiences as young kids and go through all of the years. Nobody we're not trained, nobody really knows you know how to, to, to deal with all the different emotions, like we're not taught, I mean in some household maybe.

Speaker 2:

But even if you're taught and you're, like I was always encouraged to express myself and all of the things, but even with that, just to think of all of the years of life and what someone has gone through it and experienced, that's just amazing. There there must be so much that you can pull out of people and it must be so rewarding, because I would think that also individuals who are having challenges and they're not clear as to why, you can probably trace a lot of it back to this very thing that you're talking about trace a lot of it back to this very thing that you're talking about, right.

Speaker 1:

It really, I think, empowers people to realize you like nothing is wrong with you, right? Maybe, yes, you could be responding differently, but it helps you understand your brain is responding normal, just to an abnormal situation, right, and? And your brain is just trying to figure it out. It just also has layers of other emotions that are maybe making your brain feel overwhelmed, you know, overstimulated it's. You've been carrying this emotion for how long, right, yeah?

Speaker 2:

I'm so happy you mentioned empower because, as I hear you share, I was having like this feeling come over me of that and also that feeling like you're okay, nothing's wrong with you, this is just a normal process that happens to most everyone and I just I hope that all of you listening are really, really taking this in, because this is so fascinating and I think that it's such an important, important point to know that it's normal and it's okay and whatever someone's going through, it can be worked through by what you're talking about. And again, I'm going to say probably everyone under the sun has something they could, you know, go through and release those emotions. And I love your term, emotional transference Totally makes sense. Oh, my gosh, we all do it. Oh, we all do it. Now the other, the other modality you were talking about you're the third in addition to the hypnotherapy, is called brain spotting.

Speaker 1:

Yes, so brain spotting is? It's a sister of EMDR. So an EMDR therapist was doing the eye movements with a client and they noticed the client themselves were stopping their eyes and looking a direction. So the theory of brain spotting is where you look determines how you feel. So, for example, if I were to say like oh, shelly, tell me about, like that, one really tragic accident that happened, and sometimes maybe you see friends or kids or you know people, when they talk they tend to look a certain direction, like they repeatedly keep looking a certain direction. Or if they're avoiding eye contact altogether, they're just looking a certain direction.

Speaker 1:

Brain spotting uses that and they call that spot. You look a brain spot. And so, rather than doing the eye movements that EMDR is using, brain spotting is I find one spot that is um, it's more like somatically, it's it's physically somatically more, um, more or less intense, and I will have the client focus on that spot and then the processing is just like EMDR we're getting to the end of the emotion. It's so it's the theory of the end goal is exactly EMDR. Just the way in which I get there is you do not look side to side, you are looking at one spot only. Wow.

Speaker 2:

So do you find you are using all three modalities, or do you use one and have success with that one, and then you maybe don't do the other two? Or do you use one and have success with that one, and then you maybe you don't do the other two, or do you combine them with each of your clients?

Speaker 1:

It depends on every client. I have some clients where they're like let's kind of try them all and see what happens. I do have some clients that are like I like EMDR, let's just do EMDR. And so a lot of what's the most helpful in the training of each of them is there's so much language like the clinical jargon from all of the trainings that I can adapt and tweak no matter which modality I'm using, and so I think just for me, having all of that, like those tools, in my toolkit is helpful. But there there truly is no right or wrong way. As long as you are healing and it's working for you, then then we'll do it.

Speaker 2:

And Jamie you deal, I would assume, with, with all, all various clients. Is there a certain population that you work with the most?

Speaker 1:

I don't necessarily have one I work with the most. I think I have a variety of all ages and stages of life. You know basically anywhere 19, all the way up to like I've had 70s. So across the spectrum of adulthood and across the spectrum of you know what it is that they want to work on. People tend to come to me if they have some level of like anxiety, depression, mood disorder, a lot of relationship issues. I work with a lot of adoption and attachment issues in general. Just if you're an adult, want to work through some emotions and trauma, they'll come to me. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I love this so much and I and I would think that it's very beneficial for the younger population 19, 20, 21, that they're they're working through, rather than waiting 30, 40, 50 years later. But again, sometimes you don't even know until you have some kind of a maybe tragic event later on in life or some kind of experience where you go oh, I really need to work through this or figure this out. Something's not right and I imagine that's what happens, as as people are getting older that are working with you. Gosh, this is so fascinating and so interesting. I feel like I want to have a session with you right now.

Speaker 1:

I could talk for days, Shelly.

Speaker 2:

We could talk for days, for sure, and I um, you want to be conscientious of your time and our listeners times, but what? How can people find you? Anybody wants to reach out and, and you know, look into working with you. How can people find you?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so I am on Instagram, facebook, enlightened Omaha, or my website is enlightenedomahacom, and my podcast is the Shrink Show. So it's me with a variety of guests like yourself. My husband will join sometimes and he is just your average Joe who doesn't speak mental health jargon at all, so he'll be able to come from his perspective and his you know humor into the episodes as well, and those are on all the socials at the shrink show podcast.

Speaker 2:

Well, I will certainly share all of all of your contact information in the show notes. And hey, kudos to your hubby for hopping on. I don't know that I could get mine to do so, but it could be entertaining as well, because same thing he's. He's. He's not as talkative as me, but he definitely has a great sense of humor. So that could be. I'll have to maybe think about that, but kudos to your dad perspective.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Well, I so appreciate this time. I really do. This has been so, so interesting and I just feel like it's so, it's. I just feel like this it's not like a weight lifted, but it's almost like for people that are struggling with something. This is a solution. There's a solution. And again, going back to you know, not feeling like you're all alone and not feeling like something's wrong with you, this is a real, this is a real science. This is what's happening in our brains. So I just I thank you so much for sharing all of this information. It is, it's been very, very interesting. And what would you like to leave our, our listeners with? Any? Any words of inspiration or words of wellness you'd like to share before we, before we go?

Speaker 1:

Well, I think I just always want listeners to know that healing it just like a little bit of each modality I talked about is your own personal journey and it's going to look exactly the way you want it to. So I I always like to share the modalities I use so people know they exist and it doesn't mean that's the right fit for you, but I want you to know that it exists and be curious and lean into whatever you happen to find and if you are interested or intrigued by whatever you're finding, it found you for a reason. So lean into it and trust it, because I think it's fair for everybody you know to know what to do with their emotions and to live a life where they feel like their emotions are not just running them but they are living their fullest life. So I always just want that. I, like all therapists, like I just want to work myself out of the job.

Speaker 2:

You know everyone deserves their healing, yeah absolutely do and I love that and that's just such a beautiful way to end and I also it just came to me as well that it's important for anyone to look into it, like, don't feel like you have to have a problem, because I think this is the other side of of of seeking, um, you know a therapist and and insight from a therapist when it comes to our mental health and our mental wellness, it can be just that we want to learn more and I I want to kind of emphasize that I think, with our listeners, that you don't necessarily have an issue or a problem right To seek you, you out.

Speaker 2:

It can be just a way to learn more about ourselves and I think it's so important. You know we talk about people go to the doctor for their physicals, that nobody even. But that's an eye, but for some reason, you know, it comes to the mental side. Yes, there's sometimes a skeptic, skepticism and we want to, like you know, erase that and know that it's okay, whether you're experiencing a challenge or not, to sell and learn how to to deal with any of those emotions, and I feel like there's always an all things of life room for growth and to become better in all aspects of our lives and our wellness, and so you're bringing that in such a wonderful way to the mental aspect. So I'm really fascinated and thank you so much for for having this conversation and sharing. I really appreciate it.

Speaker 1:

Of course, my pleasure. Thank you so much for having me, Shelley.

Speaker 2:

It's been so great and for all of our listeners. Reach out to Jamie she's amazing, as you can hear, and I will have all of her contact information in the show notes. And, as always, do something for your wellness on this day and have a beautiful, blessed rest of your week and we'll see you next time on Words of Wellness. Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. I hope you gained value and enjoyed our time together as much as I did, and if you know someone who could benefit from today's episode, I would love and appreciate it if you could share with a friend or rate and review Words of Wellness so that more can hear this message.

Speaker 2:

I love and appreciate you all. Thank you for listening. I love and appreciate you all. Thank you for listening and if you have any questions or topics you would like me to share in future episodes, please don't hesitate to reach out to me through my contact information that is shared in the show notes below. Again, thank you for tuning in to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelly Jeffries and I encourage you to do something for you, for your wellness, on this day. Until next time, I hope you all have a healthy, happy and blessed week. Thank you you.