Words of Wellness with Shelly
Do you get confused by all of the information that is available regarding ways to improve your health and wellness? Do you often become frustrated or overwhelmed with decisions on how to be your healthiest? We all know and understand how important our health and wellness is to the vitality of our lives, however navigating the wealth of health and wellness information available can often feel overwhelming. Understanding the significance of our well-being in leading fulfilling lives is crucial, yet determining what steps to take that are essential for our health can often be confusing.
Welcome everyone to "Words of Wellness"! In this podcast, hosted by Shelly Jefferis, M.A., a seasoned health and wellness professional with over 35 years in the industry, all of your questions will be answered and clarity will be provided through personal stories, education, tips and inspiration. Throughout her profession, Shelly has always had the heart and desire to help others feel their best and live their best lives through her supportive and compassionate approach. Through engaging solo and guest episodes, several topics will be addressed, questions will be answered and clarity will be provided in an effort to lead you to a healthier, more energetic life. With a master’s degree in kinesiology, extensive experience as an educator, speaker, coach, and entrepreneur, Shelly brings a wealth of knowledge and a genuine passion for empowering others to feel their best. By featuring industry experts and relatable individuals, the podcast promises personal stories, practical advice, and inspiration. She is excited to come to you weekly sharing all she has experienced, learned and discovered through the years. Whether you're seeking to elevate your well-being, gain practical insights for personal health, or simply be inspired to live a high quality vibrant life, this is the podcast is for YOU! Be sure to tune in weekly and join us along our "Words of Wellness" journey and embark on a path toward a healthier and more fulfilling quality of life full of happiness, energy and joy!
Words of Wellness with Shelly
Health Challenges, Three Purpose-Driven Podcasts and Fatherhood As An Empty Nester: How Rory Paquette Navigates It All
What happens to fatherhood when children no longer need you for the basics of life? How do fathers navigate the emotional journey of becoming empty nesters? These essential questions take center stage in our heartfelt conversation with podcaster and father of three Rory Paquette.
Rory opens up about his profound health journey, surviving a collapsed lung and major thoracotomy surgery that became a wake-up call to reprioritize his life. This brush with mortality led him to launch his third purpose-driven podcast and reconsider what truly matters. His vulnerability in sharing both physical and emotional challenges offers powerful perspective for listeners facing their own life transitions.
The conversation shifts to the rarely-discussed emotional impact the empty nest has on fathers. While much attention is given to mothers during this transition, Rory candidly reveals the pain and disorientation of watching his three children leave home – especially when his youngest son skipped the college transition and moved directly into his career. "My wife and I are sitting there after everybody's gone and we're looking at each other on the couch going now what do we do?" This raw honesty will resonate with parents at any stage of the journey.
The most touching moment comes when Rory shares his son's wisdom: "Dad, I still need you, it's just different. I don't need you to buy my groceries anymore... I just need you as my life coach." This profound insight captures the evolution of fatherhood – from provider to mentor, from caretaker to life guide. For fathers navigating changing relationships with adult children, this episode offers both emotional validation and practical wisdom for maintaining meaningful connections across distance and busy schedules.
Whether you're a father yourself, have a relationship with your dad that's evolving, or simply appreciate authentic conversations about life's transitions, this episode will leave you reflecting on how our most important relationships transform rather than end as seasons change. Subscribe now and join our wellness journey!
CONNECT WITH RORY: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rorypaquette
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rorypaquette
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Thank you for listening to the Words of Wellness podcast with Shelly Jefferis. I am honored and so grateful to have you here and it would mean the world to me if you could take a minute to follow, leave a 5-star review and share the podcast with anyone you love and anyone you feel could benefit from the message.
Thank you and God Bless!
And remember to do something for yourself, for your wellness on this day!
In Health,
Shelly Jefferis
And my youngest son said something to me. He said you know, dad, I still need you, it's just different. I don't need you to take care of me anymore. He said, no, I just need you as my life coach. So when I need you, I need you to be there, but I don't need you to buy my groceries anymore. And it was just a really nice way to say hey, I still love you, I still need you, even though I can take care of myself. So you know all the dads out there just remember that. You know they don't need you to buy their groceries or, you know, take care of them like that, but they still need you and when the time comes, just be ready to step up and be there for them.
Speaker 2:Do you get confused by all of the information that bombard us every day on ways to improve our overall health and our overall wellness? Do you often feel stuck, unmotivated or struggle to reach your wellness goals? Do you have questions as to what exercises you should be doing, what foods you should or should not be eating, how to improve your overall emotional and mental well-being? Hello everyone, I am so excited to welcome you to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelley Jeffries and I will be your host. My goal is to answer these questions and so much more To share tips, education and inspiration around all of the components of wellness through solo and guest episodes. With 35 plus years as a health and wellness professional, a retired college professor, a speaker and a multi-passionate entrepreneur, I certainly have lots to share. However, my biggest goal and inspiration in doing this podcast is to share the wellness stories of others with you, to bring in guests who can share their journeys so that we can all learn together while making an impact on the health, the wellness and lives of all of you, our listeners. The ultimate hope is that you leave today with even just one nugget that can enhance the quality of your life, and that you will. We all will, now and into the future, live our best quality of lives, full of energy, happiness and joy. Now let's dive into our message for today.
Speaker 2:Hey, everyone, before we jump into this episode with my good friend, I just wanted to let you all know we did have a couple tech issues, so I just wanted to let you know in advance. So I just wanted to let you know in advance. So hang in there, listen all the way through. There's so many great nuggets and again, we are kind of continuing on a theme of honoring dads, with Father's Day around the corner. So take a listen and enjoy, and we will see you in the episode. Hello, everyone, and welcome back to Words of Wellness. I am excited to share with everyone my guest today. He actually I think we did our episode on here last year. We'll have to look. I should have looked that up exactly when we did, but I wanted to have him on again to give us a little update on his wellness and health journey and also to share a little bit about what his projects are right now in the area of podcasting, because he has a lot going on.
Speaker 2:And, if we have time, I also really would love to touch upon fatherhood and all the things, because Father's Day is just around the corner. So when you all listen to this episode, whenever that might be, we are recording it just a few days and I'm going to actually put it out there just a few days before Fatherhood. So I thought it would be Father's Day, so I thought it would be kind of neat to focus on dads this month a little bit, as we focused a little bit more on motherhood last month. So, with that being said, that long-winded introduction, welcome Rory Paquette, back to the show.
Speaker 1:Excited to have you. Thank you so much for having me back. I love that I'm here to talk about fathers and fatherhood. That's just absolutely fantastic. So I'm ready to go and I'm honored to be here. Thank you, Shelly, so much.
Speaker 2:Absolutely Well. I'm excited to have you on and with that mouthful that I just shared, I know that we can talk about a lot of things, so I think I just laid it out there for us before we dive in, and I think the important thing, first and foremost, is to give us and the listeners a little update on how you are doing with your health journey and maybe just a brief overview of what you went through last year, because I know it was very, very I don't know if I want to say traumatic, but to me it sounded like it was a pretty traumatic experience everything that you went through. So I know we talked about it last time that I had you on, but if you want to just give a little overview of what you went through so I know we talked about it last time that I had you on, but if you want to just give a little overview of what, what you went, through.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I appreciate that. Um, I think traumatic is safe to say it was for me and um, yeah, I had ended up uh had horrible pneumonia which, um, uh led to my lung filling all the way up with uh with fluid and being encased and shutting down.
Speaker 1:And then, uh, the the other one, the one on the right, started to shut down, you know, because it couldn't, you know, bear the weight. So, um, I ended up barely making it into the emergency room before I passed out on the floor Cause I couldn't take it another breath. My wife got me there just in time. So, uh, woke up with, you know, tubes coming out and everything going crazy. So, ended up, um, they tried a bunch of different things to clear it out, but I ended up having a thoracotomy where they basically cut into you and, you know, cut open a big part of your back and take out the bones, and really brutal. So, uh, yeah, you know, it's been a long, long recovery. I survived when I probably shouldn't have and, um, been a really long recovery. And there's been a lot, of, a lot of things in the recovery that they they don't tell you when they're clearing you. Hey, you're all good. Just, you know, give it six to nine months, You're going to be fine. No, no, no, no, no. So, yeah, it's a lot of pain.
Speaker 2:Well, and I'm sorry that you're going through it still, I mean it's, I mean you're definitely, you know, on the mend, but it's taking a lot longer than I'm sure you had anticipated and hoped for it to take. Um, how long has it been since you had the surgery?
Speaker 1:Had the surgery being beginning of October 2024. You know, it's um doctor. Basically, last time I talked to him he said, hey, it's not going to be uncommon for this whole thing to take a year, uh, maybe a little longer. So I mean, uh, you know, we're only what? Six months past it, nine, maybe something like that, eight or maybe eight months, I don't know. But it's uh, you know it's. It's just, I mean, I'm moving fine, I'm healthy as I can be. Uh, there's just an awful lot of um you know, pain.
Speaker 1:the nerves and the muscles just don't go back together that quickly, you know, just cause the doctor shows you back up. So it's, it's been a long road. I finally got back to the gym and, uh, I've been doing a ton of that with my wife and, um, you know, the first time you try and do any kind of, you know, bench press or shoulder movement or anything like that, I mean everything's just wakes up and hurts, but but, uh, on the mend, you know. So I would imagine this time next year I'll probably be, uh, looking a lot like my old self and not feeling this way.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean you look great. You wouldn't know it, I mean in talking with you, but I think you know the really important message that we shared last time you were on and to share again, I think, today is to listen to your body and if things are going on that don't seem right or you have some signs and symptoms of something that doesn't go away, take yourself to the doctor, right?
Speaker 1:yeah, don't wait until you can't breathe anymore to go see the doctor. Yeah, for sure, prevention would have helped a ton. Yeah, it would have been been great.
Speaker 2:So well, what is the uh? Hindsight is 2020 and you know we learn. Unfortunately, you know some we learn. Unfortunately, you know some of us learn through you, Rory, and what you experienced. So hopefully this is a message that gets out to everyone to to not waste any time and if you're having some challenges, go get checked out, Right?
Speaker 1:I hope so, honestly. It was one of the best things that ever happened to me though you know we've had that conversation too. It really made me wake up. It made me look around and look what are you doing? You know, where are you in your life, what have you been waiting to do? And it was just, it was stupid. It was like what are you doing, man? So, uh, I, when that happened and I came out, okay, I changed everything in my life and it's been awesome since then A little painful, but awesome.
Speaker 2:Wow, that's amazing, because I would imagine that it would definitely change your perspective a ton, and I mean, I don't even know if that's a whole other episode to jump into, because that's really something you know. Really, if you think about changing all aspects of your life and just I would assume and I don't want to speak for you, but it's it's just raises that level of appreciation and gratitude that you have for, for everything, I would, I would guess, right.
Speaker 1:So grateful, absolutely A hundred percent. My wife and I talked long and hard after that was over. You know about what it meant and what it said and you know since then. I mean, it's become very clear to me that God's been trying to talk to me for a while.
Speaker 1:And I haven't been paying attention like I should, and that really was him giving me a little bit of a backhand going. When are you going to wake up and fall into purpose here, brother? And I finally got the message on the floor of the emergency room. But I got the message and ever since then I've let I've literally let him guide me ever since then and he, he doesn't make mistakes, so I haven't been wrong since. It's been beautiful, absolutely beautiful.
Speaker 2:That's beautiful. Thank you for sharing that that's. That's amazing and that that's a great segue into what you have going on now For all of our listeners. I met Rory because he has a podcast that is for podcast hosts and he promotes and chairs different podcasters, and so I was on his podcast last year as well, and he actually hosts three different podcasts and the newest one we just did an episode together last week, which I'm really excited to, to hear it and see it when it comes out. But I think I want, I would love for you to share your different podcasts with everyone that you're working on and getting out into the world.
Speaker 1:I appreciate that, um, the first one was the first one I ever did and it was my biggest. It's a power of man and that is a designed to help fathers and husbands, uh men, sort of navigate the world. Let them know they're not alone with everything they're dealing with in in this crazy, you know, life that we all live, um. The second one, of course, that you alluded to is the podcaster nation, which, um features podcasters. It brings them on to tell their stories and talk about their shows and, um, you know, it gives them an opportunity to tell the world what got them into podcasting, who they really are, uh, when they're not being hosts. So, and as you know, when you're on that side of the mic and you're the host, you're here for your guest. You know you're letting your guests tell the story, and so what I want to do is give all the podcasters a chance to sit on the other chair and I'll host, and they can be in the guest seat and they can tell their story. So that's been a huge success, huge success. And, yes, that's where I met you, which is super cool.
Speaker 1:And the third one, which I just started a short time ago, is called Wake Up the Lions, and that is something I've absolutely been called to do and that is based well, that's for Christian folks you know, brothers and sisters of the Christian faith, to come forward and share their testimony and talk about discipleship, and talk about leading by example more than anything else, and standing up and saying, hey, it's okay that you're a Christian in this world.
Speaker 1:You can actually say that out loud, you don't need to be afraid, you don't need to hide, and we've had a monstrous response to that. I have people jumping on all the time. I reached out to a select few folks that I knew I wanted to have on there. They had the right beliefs, the right energy and everything else. You were one of them, so I do appreciate you coming on. And, just so you know, you are, in fact, episode four and it did drop today, so I just haven't had a chance to put it on social media yet, because I've been interviewing all day, like you do, and so I'm sending you the links as soon as we get off this interview, because you are out.
Speaker 2:That's exciting and again, I'm just honored. Honored that you asked me to be on so early on of this journey and it's going to be huge and so fun. What timing, that's great timing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love it. I think it's great. So I didn't really know I was coming on here when I decided to plot it in for you know, drop today. But it all worked out.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's beautiful. I love it. Well, I think you know, given the fact that Father's Day is around the corner and you have your Power of man podcast about fatherhood, how long have you had that podcast?
Speaker 1:A little over five years, almost six Wow.
Speaker 2:It's a long time. How many episodes with that?
Speaker 1:We're at 230, I think at this point right around there, and I mean we publish every day. So at this point we didn't used to. We started off once a week, like everybody does, but right now we are. We have so much content right now booked that we're. We're coming out five days a week with interviews and then two solo episodes I'm going to start doing on Saturdays and Sundays starting this coming weekend. So we're going to have seven days a week content going out on that one.
Speaker 2:How do you find time for all of that? And then you have your other podcasts as well. That's amazing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, I'm fortunate enough that I do this full time, so this is my day job. If I were trying to work a 40 hour a week, a week you know job and do all this, I there'd be no way. So, uh, I'd be doing one, one episode a week, maybe on one podcast, and that'd be it so. But it's what I do full time. So I do anywhere from nine to 11 interviews, slash coaching calls, uh in the course of a day, and I do that six days a week.
Speaker 2:It's, it's amazing and I think, like you say, it's your full-time job, so that's what allows you to do it and spend as much time and put out so many different episodes, and that's exciting and exciting for you. I mean kudos to you. And have so so much, so many guests and have so many episodes booked out is that's wonderful.
Speaker 1:Thank you. I appreciate that it's been a long time coming. I mean, I remember the days where, you know, it was like you know, hey, would you like to come on the podcast? And you get nothing but crickets back. You know, I mean, we, we paid our dues for sure with wait. What's it called? What's it about you know? So I mean, we've been through it and you know now we've gained so much notoriety and it's it's so big that people are like, oh hey, you know, I really want to get on your podcast. How can I go about that? And I'm like, who are you? Wow?
Speaker 2:Pables are turned now right, They've flipped.
Speaker 1:Really been cool. It's been a wonderful journey to be a part of and, um, it's taken a lot. It's taken a lot and we sure take. We took our beatings, uh, too, on that podcast. It's I mean, it's a. It was about masculinity and fatherhood and leadership and you know all these other things that for the last five years you haven't been allowed to talk to or talk about, and you know so. There've been some people who have fought really hard to take us completely off the air. We managed to survive. I mean it's uh I'm not sure if I told you that before or not, but I've had three different verifiable death threats, uh, since I started that podcast.
Speaker 2:No way yeah.
Speaker 1:It's been been quite the journey. It really is.
Speaker 2:Wow yeah.
Speaker 1:Once that's happened, you you get a real crisp idea of your purpose and what you're you're looking for. So, um, what's really funny is that in the almost six years I've been doing it, I got three death threats for that podcast. Uh, I put out four episodes of wake up the lions and already got threatened, already got one. So we're up to four now. Nope in. And I got a really horrible message just the other day about how dare I talk about christianity and I was like you know, bless you. Sorry, you have such a rough life.
Speaker 2:Have a great day wow, well, and that, I guess, just goes to show that you're on to something right, and I I'm not going to say that you know people need to have a death threat, but I mean, not everybody's going to like you and like what you're doing, I guess.
Speaker 1:And four testimonies is all we've had out, and actually when I got it it was before yours dropped, so that was like we only had three out.
Speaker 2:That's insane.
Speaker 1:And people were just all over it, like how dare you talk about this?
Speaker 2:And I said well, you just proved that I absolutely need to be talking about this For sure. So you know at this point.
Speaker 1:I just wear it like it's a badge of honor. If someone's not threatened in my life, then what am I doing, Right? I'm not. I'm not making enough noise.
Speaker 2:That is insane. That just floors me. But I shouldn't be surprised, I just but I am. I mean to me, this is where we get to share, you know, our, not only our expertise, but have other people share their expertise, but also have the freedom to share what we believe in.
Speaker 1:And for someone to be doing that, and especially so soon, that's crazy. It's not, it's not unexpected, it's all part, all part of the game. So, like I said, I'm absolutely blessed to be doing what I'm doing for a living and to be, you know, running three fabulous podcasts that I love. I mean, I love all three of them so much and, um, it's just great. I mean, if you'd have told me, you know, 10 years ago, 15 years ago, that this is what I'd be doing for a living, I would have laughed in your face and been like what the heck is a podcast? What are you talking about?
Speaker 2:Right right.
Speaker 1:But today you could not have written a better script for my life. Right now, my wife and I are, you know, empty nesters. Our biggest worries are, you know, me getting my podcast done and which kid are we going to see, and when you know, you know, and which one of these yahoos is going to give me some grandkids first, you know. So it's like, come on, people, my, my youngest son got married in, uh, in December um of last year and uh, and so my older son and my oldest is my daughter. They're both getting married this coming October. You know, because they're trying really hard to kill me, so they put both weddings within like 10 days of each other.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's insane.
Speaker 1:I mean, I'm going to get one tux, you know, in to be serviced and get it back, like you know, two days later for somebody else's wedding. So I'm like all right, look, by November you're all married. Okay, so all bets are off. Somebody get busy. Get me some grandkids.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Really, but I'm not sure anybody's going to listen to dear old dad at this point.
Speaker 2:They all have plans, that's amazing Two weddings in one month. And how did that even happen? How does that planning even? Did they consult with you and your wife before they did that?
Speaker 1:Now you're already laughing, so you know the answer to that. No, I mean, I'm lucky, I got the invite.
Speaker 2:At that point I might as well have a double wedding. I should think about that for my kids. Just do a combined.
Speaker 1:We're probably going to save some money if they just chipped in and both got married at the same place For sure. They're all such individuals. It's amazing and again I'm blessed to have these issues. You know, three kids all married. Three weddings within one calendar year is just sort of something that you never think is even possible. And then you're looking at it going. Well, here we go.
Speaker 2:That's amazing. Well, and that's just a great segue because you know I like to share with this podcast and words of wellness. I feel strongly that I love having various parts of wellness shared. There's so many different dimensions of it, and so as we talk about family and the spiritual side and you know those are definitely all parts of wellness and so as we lead into talking about your family and your kids, I know that you and I at one point talked a little bit about becoming empty nesters and it was around the time either right before I was becoming empty nest, I think. My husband and I can't remember the timing exactly, but I thought it would be kind of neat to share that a little bit, because I did do an episode with my friend Christine, who shared about her, her experience and her journey, and of course, I have shared a few times about it, but I haven't had a dad on and share, and so just a little bit about that experience, how that was for you.
Speaker 1:Awful, absolutely awful. Um, you know, my daughter's the oldest one. When she left, uh, I, I was, uh, I was torn up, uh, as my baby girl, even you know. And um, but I was torn up, that's my baby girl, even you know. But I was able to take solace in the fact that I had two more boys that were, you know, still in sports, still in school. Everything was good and you can kind of lose yourself in that to help with the pain from the first one taking off. Then the second one gets up and leaves, and I'm already a little numb from, you know, the wound from the first one leaving.
Speaker 1:But then this is my, my oldest son leaving. So now it's, you know, it's my boy. He's taken off right and uh, and then the baby, you know when, when the baby had a family, when, when the little little punting of the family decides he's heading off into the world, I thought, pardon me, I thought that, um, he was going to be taking both my boys earned full scholarships to go throw the discus at, you know, in college, and both of them decided to summarily walk away from them and um, and not go. So because they're both entrepreneurs to the hilt, and so I can't really fault them for that, because you know they come by that honestly. But uh, with my last one I thought for sure I would have, you know, a summer of him transitioning to college. And then you know four years of him in college, only an hour away throwing the discus where we'd be driving up and watching the meets and and all that. Well, he pulled the plug on everything and so he has his state finals in Discus one weekend and then on Tuesday after that he graduates and on four days later, on Saturday, he's leaving for his new career.
Speaker 1:And it was like boom, no closure, no prep, talk about just ripping the wound wide open. My wife and I are sitting there after everybody's gone and we're looking at each other on the couch going now what do we do? Nice, to meet you Now what? So you know it started for us really hard, but you know, when you get past that you kind of start to realize you know all of the, all the pluses and everything else, but honestly, shelly, it still hurts. I'm not going to lie to you. I mean I miss, I miss my kids every single day really hard. And there's that, that one meme that we all see on on Facebook and stuff all the time. You spend your whole life, you know, preparing the people you love the most to live without you.
Speaker 1:And it's like what you know.
Speaker 2:Obviously we did a pretty good job because they're all gone doing great, but they're all gone, so Wow, yeah, I, you know, I've, like I said, I've talked to other moms and I think that we, I think this is really important to talk about with you and to talk about with dads, because it's just as it's just as painful and challenging, and I think that we have the same I don't know as far as age wise goes, but like our oldest is our daughter as well, and then we have the two boys and I mean, you know, same thing, when we dropped our daughter off and drove away and we were driving home from Oregon, a 12 hour drive and at least one of us was crying the entire way, you know, and I remember the next day my husband crying and why can't she just come back home? Why can't she? I'm like, I know, but you know she can't and you know, and it's just that it's just painful and I don't think it's again. This is something that I like to talk about and share, even with my Moms who Flourish community, to help those moms that maybe are going through it or it's obviously at some point going to be happening for them in the future, and I like to just talk about the experience. It's not going to make it any easier, but I think having some kind of preparation for it could be helpful, because I don't doesn't sound like you guys did.
Speaker 2:We didn't, we sure didn't, had no idea, had we don't, nobody talked about it, and so that to me is really big, because it's like you're saying, you spend all these years of your life donating your time and energy and love to your kids and you still do once they're out of the house. It's just completely different. So I so can relate, so relate to what you're saying, and I just think that it's um, it's challenging for sure. But again, like you're saying, kudos to you, both you and your wife, because you're, your kids are doing well, they're all getting married and going to have families of their own. You, I mean hopefully you're hoping sooner than later.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, you know I, I need a new baseball team to coach, so I need to get going. You know it shouldn't new baseball team to coach, so I need to get going right, you know it shouldn't take too long to get nine or ten of them out, and you know it didn't. No, it should give me back on a baseball field, let's go oh my gosh, I just that's, that's crazy.
Speaker 2:I love it, you know. Going back to to what you're saying about no, no preparation with your youngest, I I don't think I could have gone through that. What you went through, like, I think, with our youngest. He went away for summer ball and that was even harder than when he went to college and I think it was just that initial time that he was gone and he was out of the house and I'm like, oh my gosh, he's just up north a few hours. How is it gonna be when he's across the country? And it's wild, because that almost was, I think, god's way of preparing us for when he did go across the country, because it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, even though it's still hard when they you know they come home and it's so fun and you just, it's just different. You just cherish every single moment and I like to say and this is not even anything earth shattering, but it's just more of the quality versus quantity the quality time together that you focus on I mean, that's the way I look at it is just really focusing on being more present than ever and just enjoying the time when you are together because it's definitely different.
Speaker 2:Our middle son today was texting me about hey, are we going to plan our family vacation again in August. I said me about hey, are we going to plan our family vacation again, you know, in August? I said, took a deep breath. I was like, yes, we just have to figure out how to fit it in with this and that and your schedule and your sister's schedule and this and that and the other. And so you know it's it's a puzzle, you know you make it work, but it's completely you just, it's just different. You can't just throw the kids in the car and go.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:They're all adulting now, so you have to take into consideration all of all of the schedules and jobs and school, and it's an amazing journey. It just it changes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it does. You know, we we were talking to some other folks who went through the same thing that you and I are sitting here talking about, and you know they brought it up. They said, hey, you know, you guys didn't even get college. You know, because at least when you have college they're coming home for like Thanksgiving or for Christmas break. The following summer maybe they come home, live at home, work, then go back to school. I mean, there's at least those options or short-term things you can look forward to.
Speaker 1:Mine left home and went to build their businesses and their lives. I mean they, they took off. And you know, next thing, I know my youngest son's living in Indianapolis. I'm like, oh well, he's not coming home for Christmas because he lives in Indianapolis. Now it just all of a sudden, the whole thing just changed and so, you know, my wife and I just realized that it's just a shift and what we have to do now is we have to be very intentional about trying to see all three of them whenever we get a chance. You know, so it's, you know, talking to my daughter hey, you know, what do your work schedules look like? We want to come visit When's when's good. You know, of course she plans five months out from today or something. Um, you know my oldest son it's like yeah, dad, I don't know, next week, what do you got coming down for sunday, cool difference between the boys and the girls and my youngest son's.
Speaker 1:You know like uh, dad, I don't have time, I gotta work. Call me later, so he's off. You know, making more money, more money. Like I got to make another million dollars, dad, I got to go see it See you bye, right.
Speaker 1:So everybody's got their thing. But we figure it out. And we just had my wife's birthday. It was over Memorial Day weekend and we got to go see both of them. They're working in the same location and we kind of snuck over there and my wife got to celebrate birthday with her at least her two boys, you know which is good. So we have to do things like that and as parents we just have to be more intentional.
Speaker 2:You're talking about being more intentional as parents. I totally relate to that because I sometimes it's exactly like you guys. We're with two, if we can be with two, like my, my older son was out here for his baseball team and then my daughter met up with us and then our younger son was out here. So you just you just make it work and however that looks. And then you have to be creative and planning those times where you can all be together and you just cherish all those moments. And we're exactly like you and your wife is just making those plans and coordinating the schedules and planning the travel and doing as much as we possibly can to to see them and be with them and be a part of their world and everything that they're doing.
Speaker 2:And you brought a great point up earlier about you didn't even have the college. I can't even imagine Like I am so grateful for all of it and I'm so, so grateful. I really make a point of not taking any of that for granted, because even with our youngest son playing baseball, I think, okay, this is great, we have a couple more years of him playing ball. And then I think, okay, our older son is coaching. So you know at least we'll have that, the baseball will continue, which is amazing.
Speaker 2:But such an important point of what you're saying about the, the college experience because, yeah, if they just right out of high school, boom, they're gonna go get a job and they're gonna move away or whatever it's gonna look like for them, it is different. You do have that college experience where they do come home for the holidays or you can go visit them or what have you. And oof, I never even thought about that. You didn't, you didn't get to have that. So you, you got a little cheated. So I think you need to have a baseball team coming your way here soon.
Speaker 1:I'll take it, I will take it, I'll take it. I'll start with the basketball team, because I only need five for that.
Speaker 2:There you go, there you go.
Speaker 1:A little easier.
Speaker 2:Yes, I love it, appreciate you so much for being on and I know for my listeners we've had a couple little tech tech issues, so so hopefully you can listen and really appreciate all that Rory is sharing with us today, and I'm just so honored to have you on, I'm so honored to be on your podcast, and so this has been a great journey, and then in the midst of it we get to become friends, which is the best gift of all, so it's really special.
Speaker 1:I love your energy, I really do and thanks for having me on the show, cause I mean I love what you do. I have since the moment I met you.
Speaker 2:So thanks.
Speaker 1:Thanks again for having me back on.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and I appreciate that so much. And so, with that being said, what are your plans for father's day?
Speaker 1:Oh goodness, father's Day. I'm just hoping that I get to actually, you know, have a FaceTime phone call with all three of the kids. You know what I mean. That's really all I ask for. Don't bother sending me the card. I don't need anything else, no gifts, just give me 20 minutes of time, you know, just to talk and uh, and let me see your face. So I know, you know, so I can interact with you and I don't have a lot of needs that day.
Speaker 1:Just let me just have that. And then you know my wife will probably take me someplace where I can get some really unhealthy food to eat and drown my sorrows in a burger as big as my head or something you know. Set my healing back an extra month, but you know it'll be worth it. It'll be great.
Speaker 2:It'll be worth it. It'll be worth it, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:That's pretty much it for me.
Speaker 2:I love it. Well, that's, that's. Yeah, that sounds like the perfect day, Perfect way to celebrate. Thank goodness for FaceTime. That's the one time when you're very pro technology, right.
Speaker 1:A hundred percent.
Speaker 2:Yeah, for sure. Well, this has been great, my friend. Any last words of inspiration or advice? Maybe put it out there for the dads out there, as I'm focusing on Father's Day here around the corner.
Speaker 1:I would love thank you for that. And my youngest son said something to me. He said you know, dad, I still need you, it's just different. I don't need you to take care of me anymore. He said, no, I just need you as my life coach. So when I need you, I need you to be there, but I don't need you to buy my groceries anymore. And it was just a really nice way to say hey, I still love you, I still need you, even though I can take care of myself. So you know all the dads out there just remember that. You know they don't need you to buy their groceries or, you know, take care of them like that, but they still need you and when the time comes, just be ready to step up and be there for them.
Speaker 2:I love that. That's a perfect way to end and thank you for sharing that.
Speaker 1:Thanks.
Speaker 2:Thank you and for all of our listeners. Thank you and for all of our listeners. Thank you for being here and and supporting my podcast, and I'm going to share all of rory's podcasts in the show notes, so you know. Please start following him and listening to his amazing podcast, so you have lots of choices, since he has three. And again, thank you for all my listeners and do something for yourself and your wellness on this day and until next time, have a beautiful, blessed rest of the week. Everyone. See you soon.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. I hope you gained value and enjoyed our time together as much as I did, and if you know someone who could benefit from today's episode, I would love and appreciate it if you could share with a friend or rate and review words of wellness so that more can hear this message. I love and appreciate you all. Thank you for listening and if you have any questions or topics you would like me to share in future episodes, please don't hesitate to reach out to me through my contact information that is shared in the show notes below. Again, thank you for tuning in to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelley Jeffries and I encourage you to do something for you, for your wellness, on this day. Until next time, I hope you all have a healthy, happy and blessed week. Thank you.