Words of Wellness with Shelly
Do you get confused by all of the information that is available regarding ways to improve your health and wellness? Do you often become frustrated or overwhelmed with decisions on how to be your healthiest? We all know and understand how important our health and wellness is to the vitality of our lives, however navigating the wealth of health and wellness information available can often feel overwhelming. Understanding the significance of our well-being in leading fulfilling lives is crucial, yet determining what steps to take that are essential for our health can often be confusing.
Welcome everyone to "Words of Wellness"! In this podcast, hosted by Shelly Jefferis, M.A., a seasoned health and wellness professional with over 35 years in the industry, all of your questions will be answered and clarity will be provided through personal stories, education, tips and inspiration. Throughout her profession, Shelly has always had the heart and desire to help others feel their best and live their best lives through her supportive and compassionate approach. Through engaging solo and guest episodes, several topics will be addressed, questions will be answered and clarity will be provided in an effort to lead you to a healthier, more energetic life. With a master’s degree in kinesiology, extensive experience as an educator, speaker, coach, and entrepreneur, Shelly brings a wealth of knowledge and a genuine passion for empowering others to feel their best. By featuring industry experts and relatable individuals, the podcast promises personal stories, practical advice, and inspiration. She is excited to come to you weekly sharing all she has experienced, learned and discovered through the years. Whether you're seeking to elevate your well-being, gain practical insights for personal health, or simply be inspired to live a high quality vibrant life, this is the podcast is for YOU! Be sure to tune in weekly and join us along our "Words of Wellness" journey and embark on a path toward a healthier and more fulfilling quality of life full of happiness, energy and joy!
Words of Wellness with Shelly
Navigating Grief and Building Resilience: Kelci Jager's Inspiring Journey of Love and Faith
From facing unimaginable challenges to finding a path of resilience and faith, Kelci Jager's story is one of hope and inspiration. Join us as we explore her journey, which began with a move from Southern California to Florida in 2020 and quickly turned into a series of life-altering experiences. A car accident involving her two eldest sons and a shocking medical diagnosis for their oldest set the stage for a tumultuous few years. Kelsey's world was further rocked in 2021 when her husband, Colin, was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. Despite his courageous battle, Colin passed away in July 2022, leaving Kelci to navigate life as a solo parent to their four sons. Her story is a powerful testament to the human spirit's ability to endure and find meaning amid adversity.
Kelci's journey is also marked by her decision to honor her husband's legacy through writing. Inspired by Colin's unwavering faith and positivity, she penned "A Million Miracles and the One That Never Came." The book captures the emotional rollercoaster of Colin's illness and the indelible impact his gratitude and resilience had on their family and community. Throughout our conversation, Kelci shares insights from her personal experiences, reflecting on how Colin's positivity fueled his ability to face each setback with grace, leaving a lasting impression on all who knew him.
The power of community and the comforting signs from loved ones become a central theme as Kelci recounts the "Lace Up for Colin" event, which highlighted the overwhelming support and love from their community. She also shares poignant stories of how signs from her late husband, including remarkable lightning events, have given her comfort and a sense of connection. These narratives serve as a reminder of the enduring bonds of love and faith that transcend life's challenges, offering hope and inspiration to listeners facing similar hardships.
CONNECT WITH KELCI:
Facebook: www.facebook.com/KelciJager
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Website: RISEwithgrief.com
CONNECT WITH SHELLY:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wellnesswithshellyj
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ShellyNeumannJefferis
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Thank you for listening to the Words of Wellness podcast with Shelly Jefferis. I am honored and so grateful to have you here and it would mean the world to me if you could take a minute to follow, leave a 5-star review and share the podcast with anyone you love and anyone you feel could benefit from the message.
Thank you and God Bless!
And remember to do something for yourself, for your wellness on this day!
In Health,
Shelly Jefferis
He saw the best in every day. He saw the best in every person and he really lived his life in a way where he left the world a better place, and the world did get a little bit dimmer the day that he passed away, but I am determined to make sure that his legacy lives on and that his light continues to be spread throughout the world.
Speaker 2:Do you get confused by all of the information that bombard us every day on ways to improve our overall health and our overall wellness? Do you often feel stuck, unmotivated or struggle to reach your wellness goals? Do you have questions as to what exercises you should be doing, what foods you should or should not be eating, how to improve your overall emotional and mental well-being? Hello everyone, I am so excited to welcome you to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelly Jeffries and I will be your host. My goal is to answer these questions and so much more to share tips, education and inspiration around all of the components of wellness through solo and guest episodes.
Speaker 2:With 35 plus years as a health and wellness professional, a retired college professor, a speaker and a multi-passionate entrepreneur, I certainly have lots to share. However, my biggest goal and inspiration in doing this podcast is to share the wellness stories of others with you, to bring in guests who can share their journeys so that we can all learn together while making an impact on the health, the wellness and lives of all of you, our listeners. The ultimate hope is that you leave today with even just one nugget that can enhance the quality of your life, and that you will. We all will, now and into the future, live our best quality of lives, full of energy, happiness and joy. Now let's dive into our message for today.
Speaker 2:Hello everyone, and welcome back to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelly and I will be your host today, and we are bringing you a very special episode today with my new friend, who we actually did an episode a little while ago, a few months ago, and I encourage you all to go back and listen to that episode. It's actually episode number 18. To that episode it's actually episode number 18, but I am here with my guest today.
Speaker 1:Kelsey Jager and I'm just so honored to have you back. I really am Welcome. Thank you, shelly. I'm so happy to be back here with you.
Speaker 2:Yes, I'm really looking forward to this. This is going to be a special episode for anyone of you who maybe heard our episode originally back a few months ago, and I will have Kelsey share a little bit of her story, but she has some exciting news to share. Something that she was working on that is now has come to fruition, and so that's what we're going to be talking about today. So do you want to share just a little bit of a background today, or do you want to just jump right into our discussion? How do you feel?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'll share a little bit, but, yeah, definitely go back and listen to our first episode because I might go deeper on that episode.
Speaker 1:But basically so, my name is Kelsey Jager, I am a certified life coach grief coach, and my journey in this work work started in 2020 when we had just relocated from Southern California to Florida. My husband and our four boys and our four our two oldest boys were in a motor vehicle accident and and they were hurt. Our second oldest son needed multiple surgeries. He was rushed off to surgery and our oldest son had. He wasn't as injured, but he did suffer a head injury. So they did a brain scan in the ER to, you know, just make sure that there wasn't anything serious going on from the head injury. And we discovered at that time that he had a brain tumor, and so that really really was challenging and definitely threw me for a loop, um, but with my husband by my side and our faith, we were able to get through that and fast forward to today. Our boys are healthy and they're doing well. So that was in 2020. And so, when 2021 was coming, on New Year's Eve of 2020.
Speaker 2:And.
Speaker 1:I'm so ready to welcome 2021. Like, yes, like, this year has been the hardest of my life. We had relocated across the country.
Speaker 1:COVID happened you know, my boys had their accident, we discovered my son's brain tumor. You know, my boys had their accident. We discovered my son's brain tumor. I was like I am ready to say goodbye to 2020 and welcome 2021.
Speaker 1:And so 2021 came and on January 2nd so just the second day of the year my husband ended up in the emergency room. He had not been feeling well the last couple of weeks. He just felt like a little under the weather. It felt like, um, he kind of had the flu, had some, some chest pain, but it wasn't like heart chest pain, it was more like muscle aches. And so on January 2nd, he um had spiked a fever and he was just not feeling better. So he went to the emergency room to get checked out. We thought it was going to be a quick, quick visit. Um, he was admitted into the hospital and after seven days of intense testing, the doctors didn't know what was wrong with him. They were testing for everything. Um, we discovered that he had acute lymphoblastic leukemia, which is a very aggressive blood cancer, and so this on the heels of the accident my son's brain tumor.
Speaker 1:I was not okay. I completely fell apart, and in every sense of the word, and I was completely shattered to the core, and I didn't know I was going to be able to survive that challenge. Tragically, after 18 months of intense treatment and fighting and challenges, my husband did pass away, and so that was exactly two years ago, in july of 2020, um 2022, 2022. And as I was left, you know, devastated and heartbroken. Now, as a solo parent to our four boys, and I was experiencing unimaginable pain and facing challenges that I never imagined that I would have to face, and I really worried my children were going to lose me as well. But I refused to let that be the end of my story. I was determined to rise and thrive. Not just survive the grief, but to rise within it and really thrive. And so that journey inspired me to become a certified life coach and grief coach, building on my experience as a registered nurse, and I started my company Rise With Grief, and now I guide others on their unique path through loss and healing and healing.
Speaker 1:But my mission to spread hope goes beyond coaching and, as I'm excited to share with the world, I have written a memoir titled A Million Miracles and the One that Never Came, and this book is written from my perspective of our family's story, and it's through my personal journal entries that I take the reader along with me as we face one challenge after another, and this book explores the complexities of the human experience, the depths of love, the anguish of loss and the resilience of the human spirit. And amidst the darkness I found light, and I recognized both miracles, both big and small, and so this book is for anyone who is facing hardships or simply seeking inspiration, and our story serves as a powerful reminder of hope's transformative power. And it shows that even in the darkest moments we can find light, and that light can help us find strength that we never knew we had.
Speaker 2:That's so beautiful. I feel like we just need to stop and end right there. So beautiful I can you share with our listeners, Kelsey, how you came to write this book and how you came up with the title?
Speaker 1:Yes, so it's um, my husband Colinin. So when he was diagnosed in january of 2021 with leukemia, he was that first stent in the hospital. He was there for almost six weeks and, um, he was receiving treatment, and the treatment for leukemia the type of leukemia that he had is very, very intense and very aggressive, and so he um the. The chemo was very effective at killing the cancer, but it was also very effective at killing his healthy cells. So he went into liver failure and, at um almost six weeks in, they had to stop all treatment and just see what his liver was going to do. And we didn't know if he was going to get sicker, if the cancer was going to get stronger or if his liver was going to recover and the cancer was going to stay at bay to recover. And the cancer was going to stay at bay.
Speaker 1:Um, as a registered nurse, I was very involved in his treatment. Every single decision that was made, um and he had been begging to go home, begging, begging, begging to go home, and so when we kind of hit this point where he had to stop treatment, we weren't really sure what his liver could do. There's not really much you can do to support the liver. You just kind of have to wait and see if it's going to heal itself. The doctors did agree to let him go home with the promise of me, you know, doing 24 seven care, taking him in to get labs every morning and to take him back if I saw anything that was alarming. So we came home and not knowing where things were going to go and Colin was is a man of great faith and he was so certain that his liver was going to be healed and he was going to be able to continue with treatment and I wasn't so sure. Um, as a registered nurse, I know that there's a chance for the liver to heal, but I also know there's a chance for it to not heal and and for this leukemia to get stronger. So I wasn't so sure.
Speaker 1:But he was, there was no doubt in his mind and, um, he did his liver, his lover did recover quite miraculously, which I described the whole experience in the book and at that time he told me that I was going to write a book about our story. And I kind of just played him off, like when I laughed and was like, okay, like I don't, I don't know why you think I'm going to write a book. I'm not feeling like I'm going to write a book and I, quite frankly, don't want to write a book. He wouldn't let it lie. He would bring it up every couple of weeks, like have you started thinking about your book? And I would be like Colin, I don't know why you think I'm supposed to write a book. Like I'm not feeling this way. And he would just smile at me and say you don't know it yet, but you're going to write a book and your book is going to help millions of people. And it was like okay, I think that maybe you're the one that's supposed to write the book. Like you're the one that has cancer, not me. Like I'm not sure who's going, who's gonna want to hear you know the cancer journey from my perspective. And he would just so adamant, it's not me, it's supposed to be you.
Speaker 1:So fast forward, um, you know he would bring it up every couple of weeks and I would just kind of placate the idea like okay, whatever. And he'd be like have you thought of the title, have you thought about what you're going to write about? And I'd be like no, I haven't. And so fast forward to he has passed away and I hadn't thought about the book in months because at the end he was really sick and he, I don't think, the book was on his mind either, and he was the one that would always bring it up to me.
Speaker 1:So I hadn't thought about the book for months.
Speaker 1:And there are a lot of Greenway trails by our house and I was riding my bike on the Greenway trails and we would always ride these trails together, he and I, and I was talking with him, as I so often do, and I was just sharing my thoughts and my feelings and not even thinking about the book at all. And clear as day, the words into my mind came. The name of the book is A Million Miracles and the one that never came. And when I heard that, it was like the lightning had struck my heart and you know, I started to cry and I was like, okay, I guess I'm going to write a book. I had finally heard the call that I was supposed to write this book and then, when I received the inspiration for the title, I knew exactly what I was going to write about and I knew I was going to tell our story through my journal entries that I had kept as a form of coping through the grief and the pain and the trauma while we were going through this horrific experience.
Speaker 2:I just I get so emotional when you share about this, because I know we've talked briefly about this before and just how the title came to you on that day is like you say, it was clear as day and clearly from Colin. I mean no doubt about it. And you know, there's just so many, so many parts of this book because I read most of it, not every detail, but much of it. And the time that we had here before our recording today and um, I just it's one where you, I couldn't put it down, like I I thought, okay, let me, let me kind of go over and just do a little bit of a reading through parts of it. But I couldn't do that Like I, I started and then I was, I couldn't stop until I finished.
Speaker 2:And one thing, like you mentioned how resilient Colin was and what a positive, unwavering spirit that he had and the faith that he had. And you, you all have his family. I mean it was so precious, the picture that you share of your son praying as he had finished fasting and just all of the different moments I mean you just so eloquently share and so, in so much vulnerability, the, the experience, and I was just obviously, you know I didn't know every detail. I mean, we we've met and we've done our podcast episode and and to to really have a grasp and start to look at this and go, oh my gosh, the highs and lows, the, the, oh, he's getting better to, oh no, his, his, he's not. And his numbers are better Now they're not. I was like, I mean, I don't even know how you. I mean I know you had your moments and you broke down, obviously many times, rightfully so. But to have the strength to endure what you did is is unbelievable.
Speaker 2:And I didn't know about your sons, your two sons, in that accident prior to Colin's diagnosis. So to experience that and to get through that, only to turn around a few, whatever it was, just a few weeks later, really right, I just there's so many moments in the book that I just I couldn't stop reading and I was just I, I was, I couldn't believe, I couldn't believe such the rollercoaster, right. And you know I it made me kind of reflect a little bit, because my mom dealt with cancer and had a diagnosis and it took her life about a year later for her diagnosis, and this was over 15 years ago, and now we didn't live in the same town, so I wasn't there every moment, like you were, obviously, with your husband, but I just I feel like what you guys experienced, I mean and I have to say this is my thought right now too is because he was so resilient and so positive. That's probably why he was able to come back so many times. Do you feel that?
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, he almost as I, as I talk about in the book. We almost lost him multiple times and it was like on the brink, and then he would come back, and then we would be like, okay, like he's good, and then it'd be on the brink, and then he'd come back. And so it really was this roller coaster.
Speaker 1:Colin never, ever, lost his faith. He never, ever, um, like, he never became bitter, like through the experience he became better. And he would say and it would make me so angry when he would say this but he would tell people that he was grateful for the trial that that we were going through, because it was making him better. And I would be like, don't say that I'm not grateful for this, like I don't want to be going through this, like no, um, but that's just who Colin is. He is such a man of great faith, he is such a man of love and genuine kindness and on his worst days, he would find joy in making those around him feel good and happy and leave his room feeling better than when they came in. And that is Colin's legacy. He, he had this special way of making people feel like he was their best friend and it was genuine. There was nothing fake about it.
Speaker 2:You can see that in the pictures, even the pictures, many of them when he is in the hospital hooked up to tubes and he's still smiling and he just has this look about him Like you know that he's sick, but at the same time it's almost like this kindness and calmness and just just a peaceful look to him and you can just see what a good person he is, and the good heart that he had and and it is.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I just can't say enough good things about about the book and what you have done. I just I give you so much credit. I mean, I know at one point when you say it's like you guys would take a step back and then you would take like two steps, I mean you take a step forward and like take two steps back, and I felt like that was so much of the time and it was a wild, because, even though I know how the story ends, there were moments where I started to have hope, like oh, he's getting better, oh he's, you know, his numbers are, you know it was wild, you really bring us in, because this is what you lived, and I mean just all the details, like you say you share.
Speaker 2:you just share all the moments, Colin, and just the life that you shared and then you shared as a family. And the other thing I just couldn't and I get emotional thinking about it, but the time of life that we were in, that you guys had to go through this just breaks my heart and for you and for your boys and for Colin, that was really hard to see. You know like what was that first stint was weeks where your sons couldn't come to the hospital and see him because they weren't allowed to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yes, oh yeah. Covid definitely um, complicated things and, like my, the first year he was sick, my family, my parents and my family couldn't come out from California to come help us, and that was so heartbreaking, especially for my mother to not be able to be there for a child. And it breaks my heart because I think about my boys and if I wasn't able to be there for them when they were going through something like this? Um, but then, yeah, it was, it was the whole thing and it as I share.
Speaker 1:In the beginning I was not okay. I was so, I was so distraught and so I didn't see any way out of this. I just felt suffocated by the darkness and I saw no light and I was completely, I felt completely hopeless and helpless and I actually, you know, I didn't ever question God's presence, but I questioned his love for me. I questioned if he really cared, because if he cared, why was he allowing this to happen? I had the faith, my husband had the faith, my family had the faith that he would, could be healed and I almost demanded God to heal him. And when that wasn't happening, I got so angry and and I sat in that anger for a little bit and I realized that that anger was what was not allowing me to see the light, to see that God was actually with us all along. But I was blocking that because he wasn't. He wasn't fulfilling my demands, he was doing it in his way. And it wasn't until I released that relinquish, that trying to control the things that I have no control over over. It wasn't until I was okay with God's will, not meaning that I liked it, but that I surrendered to it. That is when I was able to see his hand, and I call those miracles the light, and once I would see a glimmer of light, I would hold on to that with all my might, like it was a lifeline, because it was. That was the only way I was going to be able to survive this.
Speaker 1:And I continued that same mindset and that same practice after my husband died, because when he died I had this whole new level of grief and um, and even today I have to, like I said I just two days ago was his two-year angelversary and it's so hard for me sometimes to believe that he's gone, like a part of me still thinks he's going to walk through the door, even though obviously, logically, I know that's not going to happen. When I think about that, it's been two years Like I didn't know how I was going to get through two days, let alone two years, and that kind of takes the breath away from me and it's really painful. Every day I have to actively search for joy. I have to actively move through my day with purpose and intention so that the pain doesn't consume me and I can say that in doing that I am thriving.
Speaker 1:And that doesn't mean that I'm not still grieving. I will grieve the loss of my husband for the rest of my life. It doesn't mean that I don't still miss him. I'm not still sad. I am. But that's the duality of grief that you can have two conflicting emotions at the same time. I can be absolutely devastated that he's not here and I can have joy and gratitude for the things that still remain.
Speaker 2:That's such an important point and I it's interesting because I was just thinking about that duality, as you're saying, after this weekend I was kind of processing some things and when things are not going well in the world around us or in the country around us, but in our personal world maybe things are going amazing.
Speaker 2:It's one of those where, like yourself, people know that, know you going through the struggles and the hurt and the pain that you've gone through and then they have to still live their lives and there's that level, little level of, I guess you could say, guilt. But I felt this conflict a little bit yesterday, coming off the weekend and going. This was such an incredible weekend. Yet I'm still trying to process what happened in our country, like it's such that it's such a balancing act and there is that struggle and that just reminds me of that and it's definitely not exactly like what you are experiencing in any way. But it's like you say, you trying to process two emotions at the same time is is a challenge, is a big challenge, yeah, and I think we um, you know gratitude is such a um buzzword.
Speaker 1:I know right, have gratitude, um, be grateful, and that's so true. Like the gratitude is what helped me climb out of that dark hole. Gratitude is essential in my life, but I have to be careful not to use the gratitude against myself with toxic positivity and put on this mask of a fake smile and everything's great, everything's fine, and dismiss my ceilings of pain and grief. But I can. I can have gratitude at the same time without dismissing, and that's how we use gratitude and not use it in toxic positivity. At least he's not suffering anymore, At least you've had a love that some people never have in a lifetime.
Speaker 1:All those things that people say to me with well intentions are very dismissive of my grief journey and they create shame that I shouldn't be feeling the way that I feel. And so I think that's where that conflicting emotions come, where you're saying, like you know, the world is kind of in chaos, but everything in your personal life is great, and so you have these conflicting, conflicting emotions and it's, it's not an either, or it's an, and and I think that's the perfect way to look at it, because that's one of many things I love about you is you are real, you're you're, you have moments and you have plenty to be grateful for.
Speaker 2:yet you, obviously, and rightfully so, would still be grieving and, like you said, we'll be grieving the rest of your life. And that's where the authenticity and the being so genuine comes through, because you're you're, you're. You're dealing with the emotions and you're not sweeping them under the rug. And I can relate in in some ways when my dad died and then, you know, 10 years prior, my mom died and I can look at that and be grateful for the moments, and even the moments surrounding their last final days. It doesn't take away the pain, it doesn't take away the heartbreak. However, there's there's gratitude, and I'm grateful to God for moments that we had, and I and I know you have that.
Speaker 2:I mean you share in the book how you were able to bring Colin home, which is a beautiful thing and, gosh girl, I know everything you did was not, it didn't go smoothly. I feel like one bit, I feel like everything was such an uphill battle Just being able to get him home. Other things that you experienced and you know, of course we're going to, I'm going to encourage everyone to get your book and read all about the experience and there's so much that you share. But it was just like I say I don't physically, mentally, emotionally, how you, how you got through it.
Speaker 1:I mean, obviously, your faith and the strength of God and the strength of Colin um right, yeah, yeah, I say um, one of the most beautiful things I've done and also the most heartbreaking thing I've done is have the honor to walk Colin home, and in that moment I was. There are no words to describe the feeling that I had, but it was also so sacred and beautiful at the same time, and that doesn't make any sense at all, but it's the truth.
Speaker 2:I think it. I understand that because I had that with being by my dad when he took his last breath.
Speaker 2:So I don't know if, unless you've experienced it, it's hard to understand I think you know I because I look at that as a blessing again as as hard and it's painful as it was, I wouldn't change that, I wouldn't trade that moment with him. Yeah, I understand, I really do. Um, I was going to ask you well gosh, a lot of different things and we've covered so many great things. I just wanted to know if you'd like to share about the lace up for Colin event. Is that something that still goes on?
Speaker 1:No, that is no longer going on. Um so, my friend Rosario, she, when she found out that Colin I'll just briefly describe it for the listeners real quick my friend Rosario, when she found out about Colin and leukemia, her heart just broke. For us it was in the middle of high COVID, we couldn't really be around people, especially because Colin was immunocompromised, so we had to be extra careful, you know, on more than just the average person, and she just wanted to help us and so she came. She reached out to me and came up with the idea of having a race, a 5k race, with the community called L, called lace up for fallen, and to benefit our family, and there were virtual options so our friends and family in California could participate, and there were, um, you know, in-person options. And so we did that in May of 2021 and, and it was amazing, we had over 200 participants and a bunch of like 50 volunteers and dozens of businesses that contributed and sponsored the race. It was incredible.
Speaker 1:And then the next year, who came to me and Colin had was still sick and still fighting cancer and she said can we do it again this year? And I was really hesitant to allow her to do it again because I was, oh, what are people going to think? Or they think we're just going to be milking it like they did it last year. I was really like I don't know. It was really getting in my head of what people were going to think. And I don't want to be a burden, I don't want people to feel obligated to have to do it again. And he reminded me that it was a way to allow people to show their support for us and it was an honor for her to be able to do it. It wasn't a burden. And so I was like, okay, yeah, I'll let you do it.
Speaker 1:And, um, we had it again for the second year and it was even bigger than the first year and it was so heartwarming and we had just got really devastating news the day before and, um, it was so heartwarming to be able to go and just see all these people, some people we didn't even know show up for our family. And it really gave us. You know, that was one of those miracles. It gave us. That was the light, it gave us the strength to continue on.
Speaker 1:And even still now I'll see people. Sometimes I'll be at the market and I'll see someone with a lace up for call insure and sometimes I know who they are and sometimes I don't and it just like just puts the biggest smile on my face. It really just was such a testament. There were so many things like that that happened that were just really a testament of how much good there is in the world. We are bombarded by the news of just negative, negative, negative, and it's very easy to just kind of spin in that um, but my faith in humanity and the love of human connection was so strengthened during this experience. It really there is. For all the bad we hear, there is so much more good in the world.
Speaker 2:I completely agree with you.
Speaker 2:I completely agree, and not enough attention is brought to it.
Speaker 2:But that's what we're doing here and you have a couple moments in the book where you share how the community has really rallied behind you guys and it was just so beautiful to see and to read about that and it's like you say, when it comes down to it, there's so much good out there. It's not shared as much as it needs to be, and that's a whole other topic. Of course, as we know, I know we're kind of running out of time and I want to be conscientious of your time and the listener's time running out of time and I want to be conscientious of your time and the listeners time. And there's just a couple other things I was going to ask you or have you share, because this was so touching to me and I don't think I can emotionally get through all of it, but in Colin's last few moments and you crawled into bed with him and asking him to give you signs and make it obvious that there are signs coming from him, and I just love that so much.
Speaker 2:And you know, just to quote you, you say make it obvious, so I will have no doubt it's you. I don't know what that sign will be, I confess, but you will know what to do. Can you promise me this? And he ever so slightly moves. His head is silent, but you will know what to do. Can you promise me this? And he ever so slightly moves. His head is silent, but unmistakable. Yes, and so tell us about what happened on your phone when you had that moment.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So I um, and I said that to Colin and he had lost his ability to speak and he was very, very weak so he could barely move. But he did not, as had, yes, and he passed away a couple of hours after that and I had been so cooped up in the hospital in the home I, just after he died, I was just like I need to get out of this house, like I just so I went outside into our backyard and I I love plants, so I was outside like watering my plants on my back patio and I was talking to him like as if he was next standing next to me, if he was next standing next to me. And then I questioned if he was there, if he was hearing me, and I said, colin, are you even here? Are you, do you hear what I'm saying? And when I said that now this is just maybe 30 minutes after he's passed away, my phone was in my pocket on silence and it had like vibrated and so I thought, huh, maybe that was you. So I pulled my phone out to look at it and it was. I have a cop on my phone that's called lightning and it will notify me when there's lightning close by and it was a lightning notification. And so I kind of jokingly said, colin, was that you and right when I said that the lightning notification went off again? And I was like, okay, I just, I just knew. I just knew there was no doubt in my mind that that was his sign, that it was going to be lightning.
Speaker 1:And then, a couple of hours after that, our, our neighbors, had planned a candlelight visual when they found out that Colin was coming home on hospice and, um, so they were had already planned to have a candlelight visual that night, before he had even passed, and, um, I wasn't going to go outside. I described this in the book, I wasn't going to go outside. But then I thought if Colin was here he would go outside. And so I went outside and my messy hair pajamas, like you know, swollen, crying, crying face, and everyone just kind of paused and looked at me like no one expected me to go outside and they were kind of like, what do we do now? And then one of my friends broke from the crowd and came across and gave me a hug. And then they all started giving me a hug, which I didn't realize that I needed that. Oh, desperately, I needed that and it was such a beautiful moment.
Speaker 1:We were out there with the candlelight visual. Another neighbor had offered a prayer and there were over a hundred people standing outside in front of our house. There were over a hundred people standing outside in front of our house and there was lightning in the distance, all around us 365 degrees. But it was far enough away that it wasn't raining where we were. The lightning wasn't close enough to be a threat to us, but it was just the most grandiose display of lightning I've ever seen in my entire life and everyone was kind of joking like, oh my gosh, look at like Colin's putting on this display of lightning for us. And I was, you know, just kind of smiled in my head like you have no idea. But this is Colin. And then one of my neighbors. She brought over her phone and she showed me the radar and the weather radar. There were severe storms, I think the colors like orange when it's, or blue or something when it's like really, really intense. It was like the really intense color and it was completely surrounding us. But where we lived was the only pocket that was clear, with nothing, and my neighbor came over and said, look, the angels are protecting us, so that we could have this candlelight visual. And I was just like, oh my gosh, you guys have no idea. This is like yes, yes, yes and yes. And ice cullen still continues to show up as lightning.
Speaker 1:Um the first year, every single time we had a birthday when we would sing happy birthday, all of a sudden it would start thundering and lightning. It even happened, sally, on my birthday. So Colin died in July. My birthday was in May, you know. So almost a year later, I was in Mexico with some of my girlfriends for my first birthday without Colin and there was no rain in the radar. It even happened there.
Speaker 1:When I told my girlfriends, I was like I guess don't be surprised if we get lightning tonight and a storm, and they're like but the radar doesn't show.
Speaker 1:And I was like, I know, but I'm just telling you, it's happened on every single one of our birthdays. And they were kind of like, okay, kelsey, like you know, she's a crazy, like you know, connection to her husband, okay, whatever, um, and it happened happened and they were blown away Like, oh my gosh, you totally called it. And I was like I know, I told you I love it and I think that people will say to me so jealous because my loved one doesn't do that. And then I'll dig deeper with them and I come to realize that they do send them signs, but they, number one, either aren't open to them or, number two, they explain them away as a coincidence as this. So you have to look for them and you have to be open. But the signs, if you look for them, they are there, they are everywhere. The veil is so thin and our loved ones are just on the other side and they can see us. We just can't see them. We just have to be open to their signs.
Speaker 2:That's so beautiful and you're right. I mean, they're everywhere, we just have to be open and I, you know not anything. I don't think there's any such thing as a coincidence, but some people do, and that's those are those moments where you go. This, this was a sign, this was a God thing, this was my loved one. So, yes, yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:I love that. What would be one last thing you want to leave everyone, all the listeners with as far as? What do you want to leave about Colin? Just want everyone to know about him. I mean, you've shared so much but just I guess, the legacy, what would be the the biggest part of him that you want everyone to to know and and carry with them about Colin.
Speaker 1:Colin was a larger than life person. I mean, he was big in stature, he was stunningly handsome and I'm not just saying that because he's my husband, he really is and he never took anything for granted. He saw the best in a way where he left the world a better place, and the world did get a little bit dimmer the day that he passed away, but I am determined to make sure that his legacy lives on and that his light continues to be spread throughout the world.
Speaker 2:That's beautiful. Well, and that's much of the reason why we're doing this today is to share, to share your book and to share the person that Colin was, because even if he might not be here physically, he is still impacting lives through you.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:And that's.
Speaker 2:There's no words to describe that.
Speaker 2:That's just a precious beautiful thing and, oof, wow, I just I want to encourage everyone to go out and and find this book, grab this book A Million Miracles and the One that Never Came, by Kelsey, and I just I so appreciate you and I admire your strength and everything that you have experienced and being able to share it with the world now and being able to help support others who have gone or going through what you experienced.
Speaker 2:And that's a beautiful thing as well, and I don't want to not emphasize that because for the listeners, for the listeners, for any of you or anyone that you know, please, please, share this episode, share this message with your loved ones or friends or anyone who might be going through loss or potentially losing a loved one, and connect with Kelsey, because you can see from this you can't see what you can hear she's a beautiful person, beautiful heart and has so much to share and so much to give, and I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for being here, for sharing, doing all you do and sharing this with us, and I'm just excited to follow all that you do and all the lives that you touch. I mean, you've certainly touched mine and so I'm just the one person, so I know you're doing it to so many. So thank you for that.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much.
Speaker 2:Shelly and to all of our listeners. Again, I will put all of the information about Kelsey in the show notes. And one last time. The book is A Million Miracles and the One that Never Came. Be sure and grab it today and, as always, do something for yourself and your wellness on this day. Have a beautiful, blessed week and we will see you all next time. Blessed week and we will see you all next time.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. I hope you gained value and enjoyed our time together as much as I did, and if you know someone who could benefit from today's episode, I would love and appreciate it if you could share with a friend or rate and review words of wellness so that more can hear this message. I love and appreciate you all. Thank you for listening and if you have any questions or topics you would like me to share in future episodes, please don't hesitate to reach out to me through my contact information that is shared in the show notes below. Again, thank you for tuning in to Words of Wellness. My name is Shelley Jeffries and I encourage you to do something for you, for your wellness, on this day. Until next time, I hope you all have a healthy, happy and blessed week. Thank you, you.